No. Heartache does not necessarily make the heart grow stronger. The heart can stand, what it already has the strength to stand. Heartache, and pain, these go hand in hand when one allows one’s own heart to feel love, envy, hate – any emotion, really. I’faith, hearts have been “broken”, they say, through heartache, but I do not agree. Hearts become broken, just as hearts become stronger, by allowing yourself to be affected by the people and events in your life. Life itself, is a risk. We risk our feelings when we put outselves out to love, or to trust, or to dare to do any of these things.
There have been those in my life, whom I have trusted and loved, and who have hurt me, but I do not think I was made stronger by that. I think at one point or another, I might have felt as if I would curl up and die, or sentence myself to a cave till the End of Days. It only took a short period of time to realize that I was being stupid and self indulgent and only allowing myself to wallow. Tears can be cathartic, like rain, or strip away like acid. Strength is not born of a toughened heart. You have to have the capacity to cut yourself off from the pain or not. I am not necessarily proud of my ability, from time to time, of shutting off that part of myself so that I feel less after the betrayal of a lover, the death of my own child or when I, through vengeance, have had to poison or slit the throat of a one time friend, or lover, who had through their actions, or what was necessary and expedient had become my enemy.
But I do as I must. When my lover betrayed me for another, my heartache turned to malice and vengeful trickery. When my son died shortly after birth, I swore that I would ne’er bear another. When I found that my friend and elder Priestess was to betray me to the Crown, I did not hesitate for an instant to slip aconite inside her hawthorn berry jam, was certain that she would die by my hand. Morrigan’s heart would still to a stop by nightfall, and I was long away by then. I place no regret on my actions, nor does my heart ache for having done them.
Muse: Fanny Fae
Fandom: Original Fiction
Word Count: 407